There’s lots of stuff I don’t know about and one of them is the many different kinds of Body Lotion on the market. Now, I knew about hand lotion and have seen it around for a long time, but what I didn’t know was the specialized lotions. There is lotion for the back of the hands, for brown spots, for wrinkles and for the bottom of the hands… for rough, chapped, cracked, split, and peeling. Each, of course, comes in a different bottle.
There is lotion for the feet, both top and bottom and sides. There is lotion for the kneecaps and behind the knees, for neck, both front and back and sides, but not including the ears. The ears have their own lotions for top, bottom and sides of the ear. There are also lotions for around the eyes, the nose and the nostrils, the belly, bellybutton, fingers and fingernails, cuticles and elbows, arms and armpits. I am going to leave the rest of this alone.
Now that’s not all… each lotion is again specialized by having or not having vitamins, Aloe Vera, raspberry twig juice, anti-itch, anti-allergens, powdered dead fish scales, essence of dill weed oil, liquid cinnamon, smashed up apricot seeds, cucumber drops, powdered pomegranate juice, juniper berry extract, lily pad juice, or fragrance of rain forest moss (that one is organic) and many other fine additives. Of course, they each come in a different bottle.
I love America. I love capitalism. I love democracy. I love marketing. I love choices. I love lotion for my kneecaps with essence of grapefruit extract in it.
And you shall know the truth and the truth will set you free. Jesus