SWING THERAPY

I am considering a franchise set-up for the Swing Therapy I mentioned in yesterday’s Journal entry. It will work something like this: For a nominal investment of $2999.99 I will send you two pieces of rope about 20 feet long with the knots at the ends already pre-tied and a 2”x8”x20” plank seat pre-drilled and ready for the knotted ropes to be slipped through the holes and then you are ready to tie it to a tree limb or some other device, but trees are recommended for the aesthetic advantages. But wait, that’s not all, along with the ropes and seat there are full instructions for various Therapies:
1. Prayer Swinging- this is starting Swing Therapy, but if you are ticked-off and angry with God and others—just go to one of the other swing positions.
2. Fast and High Swinging- this is for the very happy and pleasure seeker or for the angry and frustrated to work off steam.
3. Slow and Low Swinging- this is for the melancholy and uncertain, for the depressed and for those who hope to slowly hear an answer.
4. Medium Speed Swinging- this is for those who have it all together and don’t need the Fast and High or the Slow and Low swinging. They don’t need anything or anybody.
5. Sideways Spin Swinging- this is for those in the whirlwind of decision-making and need to feel the right and left spins to get a sure answer.
6. Sitting and Stopped Swinging- this is to completely stop and sit on the swing and stare into space until clarity, or more non-clarity, are obvious.
7. Belly Swinging- this to lie belly down on the swing seat and drag your toes with your hands behind your back holding the ropes. This is mostly an exercise in self-distain and looking back. (This is not recommended for beginners)
8. Pleasure Swinging- is just swinging to swing, like dancing to dance. This is a highly recommended therapy.

There are many other Swinging Positions and all have their specific value, but the real value in this franchise investment is to be able to stop paying for a psychiatrist, psychologist, counseling, self-help books, new age gadgets, feathers on your rear view mirror and just swing into health and wholeness with Swing Therapy.

“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you.” Jesus